Weird moment today… actually most of my days are filled with weird moments and strange conversations… Sometimes it feels like I am just always caught off-guard or just unprepared to talk to someone… anyway back to today’s weird moment.
Sitting at my foot doctors for a quick visit, I of course brought my girls and was sitting there waiting for the Doctor. I looked around at the wallpaper and was brought back to the day I found out I was pregnant for Madeline. (A quick note- my primary care doctor moved across the parking lot a couple of years ago and my foot doctor is in the old offices)…
I realized that the room they always take me in when I have all the girls is the same room he told me I was pregnant in. I remember my Primary Care Doctor saying, in a really happy way “You are pregnant!”… and I must have looked exactly how I felt- TERRIFIED and SCARED and SAD. The realization that I was about to become a grown up… that I only had about 1 year of work experience under my belt… that I had literally just gotten married weeks before… I was so not ready to be a mom. I came home that night and had the worst migraine and it was Halloween. I not only could take no medicine for my headache… I found out that I couldn’t eat cookie dough, deli meats, no wine… and it was A LOT for me to take in. Matt told me “Erin, don’t worry. It is going to be good. We are going to be okay.” It took me about 8 months to come to terms and be excited about Madeline… then her labor and delivery were HORRIBLE. It took me another several months to like her… She was the very best person to happen to me.
Madeline made me so happy so often. She made me want more kids very soon… She was content, simple, happy, a great sleeper, a great eater… and chock full of joy. God made her of only the good stuff… even when she was a little stinker. We spent days putting miles on strollers… first a single one, then a double and finally a triple stroller. These girls have been the best job ever… the hardest and the most challenging… but the best.