I woke up with a crazy puffy face. I assumed that the day would be terrible and heavy and hard. I had to clear some things up with Matthew and they weren’t easy. I am always so sure that God made Matthew for me… and then last night I thought I might just be wrong. Today I was sure I am just wrong. That God just made Matthew and we ended up together and along the way we made a Madeline, an Amelia and a Lucy. That I had the wording all wrong.
Just as I typed those words to Matthew and I was working to accept them… my phone vibrated and I got a Facebook inbox message.
Rewind… 18ish months.
God has filled my world with people carrying us in prayer. Amazing people, some that knew us and some we had never met, are praying like crazy for my family- still today. In the beginning of this new journey I met someone who God really changed and God really had her pray. He has her occasionally share- and it is always at this pivotal moment. Sometimes she finds out later why some specific type of prayer (marriage, heavy, numb) or sometimes it is for a specific moment to be easier (bus time, school time)… whatever the case there have been many times that I am brought back to knowing that God is right here and He’s got my back. Today’s occurrence was just like that. I got this message when I consciously decided to give up and that I was wrong… God didn’t make Matthew for me. This message was about praying extra hard for my marriage. That she was brought to pray very hard for Matthew and I and our confusing heavy lives and difficulty with marriage… it was a specific type of prayer. I believe that it was my little sign. I believe that it was God telling me that I always have known the answer… and to stop fighting and struggling with it.
So thank you for the perfectly timed message. There is no way that the gift was in the timing…