In the past few days I have barely been on Facebook or working on emails (which means I am behind on work- but I will get there)… I have hung out with the girls more, semi cleaned my house more, thought about the time I used on Facebook and looking at others lives… and I think I am better! Seriously, I think I should have taken a break long ago.
A few weeks ago our counselor talked to me about taking St John’s Wort as a mood booster and maybe a little help with my heart and mind dealing with all the hard crap that life keeps handing me. I have slept better since and I feel a little lighter (and not on the scale… damnit). I think I feel a little better, and a little is a big step in this world.
On top of that… I lost my phone and became disconnected by accident. The next day I read the article that I shared and it got me thinking… and thinking… and considering. I think this is a big step toward finding some of the happy… at least the okay. I quite like that the world can’t bug me. I will get a phone but am VERY much leaning toward/pretty sure I will only have text enabled and phone. I don’t need to be multitasking and running and rushing and answering emails and messages and facebook messages and questions and calls- immediately. I mean seriously, who really needs me immediately?!!? More often than not I place that ‘immediately’ need on the message, email, call, text, etc. I created a brain that is sooooooo used to doing those things immediately that I am ALWAYS doing them. I feel stress when I am not. The past 3 days I feel less stress about that, because it isn’t possible. I am going to make it impossible all the time :). I am determined to set up a time that I do work, and stick to it. There will have to be flexibility, my job is kind of all over… kids schools, workout, meetings for Maddie’s Mark, playground stuff, articles that are due, letters, setting up ‘best days ever’ and setting up and attending events. It is a great and amazing and fulfilling job and life… but I want to see the life part more. I will (and if you know me, and how I treat a challenge to myself then you know I will work hard) see more time and good and happy and easy and low stress and less work… I will.
There I go again, sharing a goal. Now you get to help my stay in line and work on it… now you get to learn from my mistakes and look into your connected or disconnected lives and see what you love or hate or what to change or need to stay the same… opportunity to live better, deeper, happier, more fulfilling and more attainable.