Throughout my whole life I have said and thought the saying “Small Potatoes… in the grand scheme of life it is small potatoes”. I am unaware if it is a normal saying, a Northern New York saying or maybe a saying my family said because we were very truly raised on potatoes. It isn’t really important where I picked it up, but it’s always there. I say in the conversations in my brain and the ones I speak out loud. “Eh, small potatoes.”
Tonight I was sitting at Amelia’s OM (Odyssey of the Mind) practice, keeping Lucy occupied, watching her run in her Children’s Place boy work out pants she wanted. A few times today I thought about my girls crazy clothing choices, not so tame hair and often times lack of socks or underwear. I felt like I should care more and make them do/change/remember those things… but then my brain’s like Erin- SMALL POTATOES. (Yes my brain talks to me often) I sometimes, well many times, feel the need to explain my daughter’s interesting mix of outfit or lack of socks (most people never know about the underwear) and honestly who.actually.freakin’.cares. Why do explain the way they dress or why Lucy thinks she’s a boy… I need to not feel that need to justify. It is the way they are, really, it is small potatoes in the grand scheme of things right? I mean no Amelia is not supposed to wear tank tops that are really camisoles, or high heels to school- I don’t really want a Mylie Cyrus on my hands. I have control most of the time, but the small potatoes is more the desire to win a battle that I don’t care about. If my daughter is dressed in a safe and appropriate way- I don’t have the energy to care to fight for something different. In fact most of the time I am pretty proud that my girls are very independent. They have been dressing, wiping (mostly), buttoning, zippering and making their own food (somewhat) for a long time. I need to stop, in my own self, wondering or worrying if others think something about my slightly unpulled together girls. In the grand scheme of life- does it matter if they had nice neat hair (it is clean and brushed most days)… does it matter if Meme wears a pair of tights, a skirt, a tunic and a fur vest? Does it matter if Lucy always looks like she has Hat Head when she gets to preschool? Sometimes, I wish I were better and less tired and cared more… like I pressed taking a huge amount of pride in your appearance… then they come out dressed for Mass in their dress, fancy shoes, brushed hair and tacky necklace- and they are truly dressed in their own Sunday Best… and I know that they get it. They are proud of their lovely and beautiful bodies… they like to take bathes, they like to be pretty/cute/handsome… they like healthy teeth and clean ears… They like to be independent, but also know that there are places that deserve that extra bit of fancy. So those other days are really small potatoes- or big potatoes if you look at the quality of kid that those girls are… I guess it’s all perspective.
Darn, that is a confusing one. Summary- small potatoes are the things that don’t really matter and sometimes they are big potatoes in a different way… also sometimes our brain just overthinks, overwrites etc, etc, etc… and you are left trying to sort another person’s thoughts out because they were thinking and writing at the same time :).