A little naked.

It’s good to be a little naked, right?  To keep yourself accountable for what is there…

Let me explain…

Recently my blog was shared, by me and others, and it made me feel a little naked.  With every new person that I am related to or know… I got a little shy and felt exposed.  Today… I realized that it is good to get a little naked, feel a little vulnerable.  I started this blog as a sort of journal, a way to write out my brain’s thoughts… and understand them better.  It is still that but it is more… it is a way for me to see what has changed in me and around me… to remember events or dates that my brain might have forgotten and for me to share my experiences- good and bad.  When I find a blogger or writer I can relate to I am there… and it is hard!  I am picky.   I need life in the words, I want to sound and feel like the words on the page.  So, I am picky.  Over time I got a little scared to share my blog because it made me feel a little naked- and I was shy.  I was scared people would follow me around and try to fix me if they read my feelings or the trails I have had in the past few years.  I was just scared.  It is our there now… and instead of people piling worry on my shoulders about my life they are showing support and love.  I am showered with prayers and love and encouragement.  I am really glad it is out there.  So… if I acted a little naked when you mentioned it, I am all good now.  However, be prepared to accept my wobbly bits and loud self :)… and know that it helps me greatly to share.  It helps me to organize, to visualize and to clean up my brain.  It helps me to know that I am not alone, Madeline isn’t forgotten and I can let it all out.

This naked keeps me accountable… in a way.  I have always shared and now will keep sharing the way that I did before.  I am accountable for my writing, thinking, organizing and pondering… I can’t just start posting unimportant things because I am scared someone will see me naked :)… I will post and share even though you get to see me a little naked.  I am accountable.  (You are probably reading thinking I don’t know what Erin is talking about… but I do and it kind of makes sense in my brain, trust me)

So this is me, getting a little naked in front of you, well accepting and loving the nakedness at least.  Thank you for the words, prayers and comments.  I love them.  I carry them.  I need them.  Share them, share this… and have a good, cold, snowy day- with all of your clothes on ;).

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