A slow down saturday…

I think I needed one of these.  I needed to sleep a lot, get up a little late and sit with left over pizza and coffee and watch ‘This Old House’.  I feel like I miss my girls this morning, but this nice and slow morning is just what the doctor would have ordered if I had gone to see him.

It is going to be a darn good day, I can feel it.  Yesterday was too.  Actually this week was exhausting but it was good too.  Jeez… maybe there is a pattern in this.  Yesterday I had a kickass workout, great lunch (well muffin and coffee) and a productive afternoon before a BIG Childhood Cancer Awareness night.  Then this morning started in a good spot and so far so good…

Sometimes this life gets too fast, too busy and too full.  I love it all of those ways, but freakin’ love the slowdown.  I love the way fall and winter MAKE me slow down.  I love the holidays that are coming, cooking for lots of people, making costumes and winding down some of the work in the yard that summer has.  I love the cooler days and the movie nights with my girls.  I am dreading, in a way, the cold and hard parts of winter, but like everything else we live today and only today.  I like when I can look back and see progress… I love when I can be content in the present and look forward to bits of the future.  I think that is how we all should be.  There are times in this that the future scares me too much to look at it.  In those times I try very hard to live today only… maybe even right now only.  I am glad to be in this place.  I feel good, I feel content, I feel happy often.  I am not angry like I was, I look forward to creating new moments and memories with my girls and I… and letting go of the memories that are tarnished with negative people.  It is hard to do, since many of my young Musto Chick moments and Madeline’s last days were filled with some of these bad and negative people.  I wish I had seen it then, but here we are in this very spot.  Moving forward, living, breathing, crying, laughing, sharing, running and getting on by.  So today is a nice warm fall day… a nice lazy morning with my weiner next to me (Sparky Elizabeth Musto)… and ‘This Old House’ on the TV.  I have a good cup of coffee and some fun plans for later.  It is a good day.  Tomorrow my chicklets come home and I am going to make a big dinner… I am glad to be in this spot.  It feels good.



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