Strange thing has been bugging me today… I have a love/hate relationship with those all.day.ponderings. I was working out and thinking about it, driving around running errands and thinking about it. It isn’t my normal mindset to do that. I was that lady prepping my comeback should anyone ever say it to me. I might add that it is pretty hard to offend me, but I felt offended by a comment someone said to friend that just put down all the things that are important to me.
Talking to a friend the other night we were talking about some stressful situations in our lives. My friend told me that their spouse never really supported their compassionate self, their desire to help other families in hard spots… they didn’t say it like that though. This friends spouse told them, when they would head out to help other families with sick children or hard circumstances, that they should “Go do that thing you like to do for sick kids”. What a mean thing to say. I thought about how I would respond if anyone said this to me. I also wondered what it would be like to not have the feeling inside that you NEED to do, or better yet should do, things for people who have sick children, adults who need support, women who just had babies, friends who are broken or sad, people who are lonely or poor or malnourished. It isn’t a thing we ‘like’ to do, but it’s a thing we must do. In me I must, but maybe I have to stand back and see this from another’s eyes- since we are not all the same. I don’t feel that I just ‘like’ to do this, my friend doesn’t feel like they ‘like’ to do this, my herd doesn’t feel they ‘like’ to support us and others… but there is something inside us that knows we need to. That part of us just does it. It isn’t a hobby, it isn’t a choice always… it is part of our purpose. I think when I look from another angle… I see that maybe others can’t feel or know or understand their purpose yet. Life may not have (may never) present a circumstance that they see and know their purpose.
I do know that I hated hearing that, it felt like a terrible and icky thing to say to someone. “Go do that thing you like to do for sick kids”… that diminishes the importance of it all. I don’t even think everyone is called to take care of families with sick children but we connect to what our life brings us… maybe people who feel this way can’t understand this. I don’t know.
I do know, that the mindset that goes along with that phrase is not at all how the world should be. We all have our piles of hard. Our families have struggles, diseases, experiences, choices… things that other’s should connect to and support. My family has been very touched by Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, DIPG and Heart Disease. My pile is full of things that pertain to those, and more. Everyone can not help everyone, it is impossible. We should each do our part to support, carry, fund, change, brighten or save another person or family… it is in us. I think we are drawn to what we need to support and maybe part of our job is sharing our journey to make another person aware about a need for change. We are not aware of the piles we will take on… the journey ahead. It is terrible to say to someone “Go do that thing you like to do for sick kids”… for we never know if we might have sick children someday. So we should always take care of people- hungry, poor, less brave, bullied, sick, and dying (or anything I missed)… it is why we are all here and connected.
To the ones who say “Go do that thing you like to do for sick kids”… know that the world is full of circles and we should take care of each other, we never know when paths might cross or we might need one another… I myself know that I want to know I did my job and paid attention to my purpose.