My lovely still goes on adventures… indirectly, but she does. I went up to Madeline’s Spot this week to clean up and rake, to declutter and check out her tulips that are coming up. I brought with me some bits of adventures from the winter for Madeline. I know that she is with me and many others all.the.time. So when I or anyone else goes on adventure or trip or deployment and they send something for Madeline I know she is with them. I know they are bringing her for their little or big journey.
I cleared her spot, with the help of Cousin Tara, and then prepped for the ‘souvenirs’ from this year’s adventures. I had some good stuff… bits of earth from all.over.the.world.
I set the blue lapis rock that Molly sent from Afghanistan for Madeline. It is neat to know that she has a rock from Afghanistan, a place so foreign to me. It is such a beautiful stone, smooth and so blue. I guess I never knew rocks there looked like that, but sometimes I realize I am a little ethnocentric in my knowledge of places I have never seen or thought much about. It opens your brain up, just like travelling. It is great to know that a bit of such a foreign place is up there, on Prospect Hill. Molly has the stories and the vivid memories, the photos but she sent some for Madeline. She is carrying Madeline there and in a way showing her things she never got to see. Madeline has wings now, so I am sure her flying is much cheaper than United or Southwest… but I know that she is experiencing Afghanistan with her Aunt Molly.
I poured the water bottle of sand from Nassau, Bahamas in front of her stone. When I was on my cruise this January I brought Madeline some sand from the beaches in Florida and Nassau. I wanted her to get to really experience the difference in those sands and paradises. It made me think about the sunset while we were there and the awesome orange and shadowed trees along beach and road. It was spectacular. I thought of her there, of her getting to see that. I know she did, she sees awesome all.the.time. It is crazy, because she is in paradise. I just want to know that bits of the earthly adventures reach her. I know she is all good, she is in a perfectly safe and warm and beautiful place. I just love knowing that she sees, feels and goes on these adventures along with us.
I opened up the big Ziploc bag that my friend’s boyfriend helped me with, since I collected sand on the beach in Florida with a Benadryl box… so I could bring it home. I dumped it and bits of the crab shell I brought home for Lucy fell out. They broke it at the airport so the shell wasn’t whole… but it was kind of great to leave Madeline a bit of something really cool I found for Lucy. I dumped that sand in front of Mad’s stone and thought about the long hours I wandered that beach. I just kept looking for shells for the girls and people watching… I looked at the ocean and listened to the sound of it all. I took it in. I left some of that there, up at her spot.
I added sand to her sand, it is darn sandy up there on her hill. Her adventure sand is welcomed though, to the sandy dirt that mostly grows thyme… to the tulips that will be purple and lovely soon… I added bits of adventures, mine and others, to piles of adventures at her spot. She has rocks from trips, magnets from Finland from her dad, water globe from Annapolis, stuffed animals, a name license plate from her dad that was from the last trip to Hoffman’s Playland… just many adventures, many experiences, many bits of life she is carried on and with.
What is life with no adventures? I don’t know, I think mine is chock full… never boring, book writing kinda stuff. What is death with no adventures? I hope I never know. I hope I travel tons and wear out sneakers in races… I hope I sample food I am scared to. I hope I climb big and tall places and bring bits back to Madeline to add to her little collection. I know she doesn’t need the souvenirs, she is here and there and everywhere… I just know she loves taggin’ along.
❤ you darling. I freaking miss you. You are my sunshine… 1/3 of my sunshine.