I can’t understand this…


I can not understand having hate enough to hurt a person, let alone many. I can not understand the violence in this world. I have people in my life I am working soooo hard to forgive, but I can not imagine violence and suffering. I love people; it is hard to understand breaking and hurting.

I turned on my computer to see all this violence in Paris. It brought me back to 9/11. It brings me back to those moments of fear and hurt and heavy. I felt so scared for those involved, so sad for all the pain and fear those brave ones had to feel. I felt so sad for the wives, moms, dads and children… their entire lives were changed in only a couple moments of time. Broken and full of loss… parents lost children, husbands lost wives, children lost parents and we all lost heroes. In those moments I could not understand this, this extreme hate and idea of punishing people. It made no sense that this was reality, that the world was changed and no longer the one we all knew. I felt like I lost a lot of me that day… I began to fear the future.

Terrorism is a way to control and create fear. Fear is the payment of the suicide bomber and gunmen or pilots that were ‘lost’ to perform the act. Fear feeds terrorists… it feeds them confidence and arrogance and power. It feeds them the ability to intimidate more to their ways. Fear is a big payment in terrorism territory. It is fuel to keep moving and growing and building their regimes and power.

Tonight many people are no longer here, probably many more than I saw on my newsfeed. I hate that. Those souls were children, parents and heroes… they are what we need to remember. Tomorrow will come and I so hope that the authorities in Paris and officials in France deter any more acts and situations. I pray that those that the terrorist didn’t physically hurt or kill are safe and the world wraps their arms around them. I hope the families of those that are not here are cared for and supported. I hate what they will feel in their loss…

Tonight we need to pray that those lost are smoothly in heaven now, that they are what we remember. We need to remember them for the ones they were not for this act. My lovely daughter is so much more than a date of death and girl with cancer… let us remember them for what they all are. Let us not feed the fear and build the confidence of those terrorists. Let us show them we are stronger than the fear. We are amazing people, we are kind souls, we are humans and we are better than that. We use our words to make our points, we are moms and dads and children and heroes… We are way more than fear. We live our lives enjoying and breathing and living, carrying those that are lost with us on our adventures. We are not scared and fearful. Those terrorists did not build themselves bigger and stronger. Pray that their intimidation does not make others fearful to say no and live better.

Pray that they know we are bigger, we are stronger, we are better. We are higher and more positive. We are humans, we are people- the best kind. We are resilient and strong. We will not ‘just move on’ we will carry these lovely lost people, just as we carry those lost on 9/11… we will bring them on adventures and see the need for change in this world. You terrorists reminded us just how much we all want change. We are ready for change and we are ready to throw the fear away.

God… I know you got this. I pray that you send those families touched by this peace and take care of the ones lost and the heroes here. Help us find a way around the fear… a way to build better and stronger. Help many who have lost You to build You back into their lives. Help us move and live and grow with the new angels and their story. Send us the tools to get through this… to help more than hinder. ❤ Paris.


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