What does it feel like to watch me play baseball, mom?
Lucy asked me this the other day before her game. We were rushing and rushing to get her uniform on and get to baseball on timeish… and I smiled and said I love it.
I thought more about it as the game and time has gone by. I love the way that Lucy thinks, she is so different and often she has such profound thoughts and ideas. She is wise beyond her 8 years. Lucy’s words and writing usually grounds me, she brings me back to where I should be as a mom, a leader, a teacher and beyond. What a profound wonder she had, “what does it feel like to watch me play baseball, mom?”
She has heard me for years send her out the field and tell her to have fun, enjoy and be safe. She has run off the field for years now with a smile, excited for a free popsicle, giving me details of the game. I see the light in her eyes when I tell her I loved how she hit in the beginning or how she ran fast in the play with so and so. She is so glad when she knows I saw it, and I miss things as any mom or dad does. I never really thought to answer a question like she asked. I wish I had a better answer on that day… but someday I hope she reads this.
“Watching you makes me feel so proud. I love seeing you cheer on your friends and work hard… my favorite is seeing you when you miss a good pitch and your step to the side to test your swing. I love that you look so ‘in control’ of the bat in that moment. I watch and I feel like it is a glimpse of grown Lucy, you look so mature out there. I love that you do it all.by.yourself… even when you had so many things to do that day you put your purple on and grab your cleats… you get your bag and you tell me to move so you aren’t late. You hate to be late. I love to watch you run to meet your team on the field. Lucy I think it is awesome to see you follow the rules and participate as a team, you encourage the ones who need it and bust out in a big cheer to keep the team moral going. Lucy, most of all, I want to tell you that seeing you do something you love is one of my most favorite things. I can’t believe how self-sufficient and happy you are, I don’t remember being like you when I was 8. Bubba- you know mommy likes to talk a lot… this most- you are one special girl. I thank God every day that He picked me to help build you, and thank Madeline all the time for all she builds in you. I am proud, but I know she is so proud. I know that Madeline is a part of every run you get, every hit you hit and all of the smiles that you enjoy doing your thing. Thank you Bubba for reminding me to think deeper, and acknowledge bigger.”
Maybe we should all think out more of the ‘how does it make you feel to…’ I am sure we would be more present and content in this crazy journey called life.